God is guiding me to make this year a year of redefining my priorities in life. Rather than being spiritually filled after returning from the mission trip to India in June, it felt as if the areas of spiritual tension I had been holding onto were being released, and I felt I was in a spiritual slump. The feeling of losing control of my life left me with an inexplicable emptiness. In my head, I knew I had to regain my spiritual focus through daily quiet time and prayer, but I was unable to practice it on my own. After spending July and August like this, Deacon Seong-eun Kim suggested holding a meditation seminar together. I decided to see it as another wonderful opportunity from God and I committed to participate.
Through the meditation seminar, God gave me the joy of discovering some new aspects of the world of the Word that I had never knew before. Firstly, the weekly training created a structure to meditation, and beyond the vague reflections that may arise when reading the Bible alone, one could gain a deeper understanding of the message (considering the author’s intent). I especially found new ways to make good use of the GT booklet/app and repented for the pride I used to have while only treating the booklet as a simple assignment of the day’s scripture. I realised that I needed to meditate more deeply and use the booklet with a humble heart.
Secondly, God made us understand the true meaning of obedience. In other words, God does not expect us to drink up the Red sea, but only to reach out when God tells us to. I was shown that I didn’t have to avoid or fear anything because everything was up to the perfect God. Moreover, when I participated in the Saturday evangelism with this heart-reaching out to people without feeling burdened- I was gradually given the joy of letting go of the self-imposed limitations and engaged in the Lord’s work.
Thirdly, I needed physical discipline more than anything else, and through the October meditation seminar, I was trained to start each day with the Word and to read daily by posting my quit time reflections. Moreover, since I usually start and end my day on YouTube, the Bible app blocked YouTube if I didn’t spend a set amount of time on reading the Bible and forced me to being each day with the Word.
As a bonus, we were given the joy of sharing home-cooked meals every Friday evening and enjoy church fellowship. Although the 4 week training ends this week, I pray that I will not forget the grace and lessons I have received and continue to keep the daily discipline of starting each day with the Word(using my commute time). I also earnestly pray that, through gatherings such as the Saturday evangelism, I may understand the Word God is speaking to me and continue to obey in faith.
