Hello, my name is Wooil Park. A lot of things happened during my 2 years at GVC, but I wanted to briefly share a story which has changed my life.
Compared to other people, I have a particularly addictive personality. Because I was afraid of being in front of other people, I found my hiding place in various interests which then became addictions. These included novels, games, history, English, studies, travelling, etc. I think my mind found rest and peace while being absorbed in various interests. I was previously a computer nerd and an engineering graduate, but I wanted to help heal people who also have addictive personalities. This led me to come to the UK to study psychology.
God had revealed to me that the gospel is the one and only real solution and anything else was like ‘broken cisterns’ (Jer 2:13). However, I turned a blind eye and tried to find a solution in psychology. I thought to myself ‘How can I evangelise when I’m afraid of standing in front of people and when I can’t speak English well’? I lived foolishly by not listening, not obeying and running away from God.
During one of the cell meetings at GVC, we were reflecting on Matthew 22:21, which says ‘Give back to Caesar what is Caesar’s, and to God what is God’s’. At first, I did not understand why this was a wise answer. Upon further reflection, I asked myself ‘Who do I belong to? Does my life belong to God or to me?’. Around the time when I began to acknowledge that I am God’s and that I should approach God more earnestly, COVID19 pandemic hit.
When I found it difficult to pray during lockdown, God made me realise that I had been a hypocrite. During Zoom cell meetings, I noticed that I prayed quietly not to stand out. So I asked God for someone I can pray with. God was faithful and linked me with someone almost instantly. I had been confident that studying psychology was a path that God had allowed and prepared for me. But through God’s light, He let me see that even psychology had become yet another false idol in my life. I confessed that my sins, my false idols and my hypocrisy were too great for me to overcome. I bowed down before God praying, ‘I can’t, I can’t follow You by myself. Let me have Your way. Let me have Your way in me’.
Over several weeks, I repented over my past days. I had confessed that I loved God, but did not reflect it in my actions or through prayer. Since then, my life has turned 180 degrees. Like Job’s confession ‘My ears had heard of you, but now my eyes have seen you’, I gained strength to approach and seek God. I am still afraid things will go awry due to my faults and weaknesses. I pray that I’m on guard against my sinful nature. I strive to start each day by praying, ‘God, I am Yours. Please teach me how to live by Your way.’ I want to live the rest of my life with this confession.
I am always grateful that God spoke to me in many ways during my time at GVC. Also, I thank God for the many members of the congregation I was fortunate to meet and have fellowship with as I served GVC in small ways. I’m not sure if and when God will send me back to London, but GVC will always be in my prayers. I love you all.
